i have heard several folks talk about leaving their church lately - this has been on the back burner for a while - it's time to share it
so you’re thinking of leaving your present church - let me offer some advice - change that - let me admonish you
know where you are going - the only reason to leave a church is because God is leading you elsewhere - so don’t just leave - go - God never told anyone in the Bible to leave - except when He told them to come out of their sin - He led them to not from - abram - israel when in egypt - Jesus called the disciples to follow - not just leave - think about it - there is not even a need to shop for a church if God is leading you - unless you are looking for the church you like instead of the church God is leading you to - so where are you going? - if you don’t know - stop
who to tell you are leaving - if you are serving in a ministry area then speak to the person you report to - if not then speak to the pastor - and if you’re not involved in serving then be real - don’t get offended here - but if you’re not serving then don’t make a big deal over your decision to leave - i’m not saying you won’t be missed - but people leave churches every day - church leaders have to deal with it - in a hurry - and get over it - don’t be upset if they do - the mission requires it
how to tell them - don't torture them over lunch - no one deserves to be treated to an hour long dissertation of why they don't measure up - no one wants to cover their disappointment with a smile for an hour - using the old adage make it short and sweet - short - and - sweet - did you get that last word?
be honest - why do people think they have to belittle or put down a church when they leave it? - just be real - "pastor, you know I've been struggling with..." - maybe it's your place in the church - your calling to do something new - just be real - the only reason to leave a church is God’s direction to do so - it's probably not the preaching - or the worship - or the youth program - or kids church - if you were fulfilled in serving that church you probably wouldn't be leaving - no matter how dry the sermons are - take your part of the blame - you probably came to that church with problems - frustrations - maybe even unreal expectations - you weren’t perfect - you still aren’t
be honest - don’t say you aren’t getting fed - they’ve heard that one so much they won’t believe it - and truth is the only ones that need to be fed are babies - so if you’re not a new convert you are responsible for feeding yourself - and if you aren’t a new convert then you’re supposed to be helping feed others - no one is supposed to be feeding you - hebrews 5:12-14 - so if God is leading you to leave just say so - and leave it at that
be biblical - never leave over hurt feelings - if you have anything in your heart against anyone in the church - staff - leader - member - forgive them - mark 11:25 - if you can't forgive it then go to them - no one else - period - that is Jesus' explicit instruction - to the letter - matthew 18:15 - doing otherwise is willful disobedience - and sin! - and if you know someone in the church who has something against you - go to them - before you leave - make it right - don’t leave someone behind dealing with junk that you’ve long forgotten about - matthew 5:23-24
bless them - bless the church - bless the pastor - bless the ministries - speak highly of them publicly - privately too - if it is God's church you don't dare attack it! - not today - not next week - not next year - pray for them - ask God to give them favor - to reach every soul He has targeted for them - here is a good way to keep your attitude in check - send them an offering the week after you leave - designate it for the pastor's passion - or if you were hurt at him send it as a love offering for him - but keep that info to yourself - don’t brag about making the gift - stay humble
finally - leave - don't lurk in the shadows - don't hang around in their chat rooms - even if you are close to someone that still attends don't give them something to take back to church with them - don’t set them up to defend you in your absence - if you follow my admonitions above there will be no reason for defending you - leave - leave the issues alone - leave your issues alone - don't rejoice over the church’s problems - but rejoice every time you hear a great report about any ministry!
so you’re thinking of leaving your present church - let me offer some advice - change that - let me admonish you
know where you are going - the only reason to leave a church is because God is leading you elsewhere - so don’t just leave - go - God never told anyone in the Bible to leave - except when He told them to come out of their sin - He led them to not from - abram - israel when in egypt - Jesus called the disciples to follow - not just leave - think about it - there is not even a need to shop for a church if God is leading you - unless you are looking for the church you like instead of the church God is leading you to - so where are you going? - if you don’t know - stop
who to tell you are leaving - if you are serving in a ministry area then speak to the person you report to - if not then speak to the pastor - and if you’re not involved in serving then be real - don’t get offended here - but if you’re not serving then don’t make a big deal over your decision to leave - i’m not saying you won’t be missed - but people leave churches every day - church leaders have to deal with it - in a hurry - and get over it - don’t be upset if they do - the mission requires it
how to tell them - don't torture them over lunch - no one deserves to be treated to an hour long dissertation of why they don't measure up - no one wants to cover their disappointment with a smile for an hour - using the old adage make it short and sweet - short - and - sweet - did you get that last word?
be honest - why do people think they have to belittle or put down a church when they leave it? - just be real - "pastor, you know I've been struggling with..." - maybe it's your place in the church - your calling to do something new - just be real - the only reason to leave a church is God’s direction to do so - it's probably not the preaching - or the worship - or the youth program - or kids church - if you were fulfilled in serving that church you probably wouldn't be leaving - no matter how dry the sermons are - take your part of the blame - you probably came to that church with problems - frustrations - maybe even unreal expectations - you weren’t perfect - you still aren’t
be honest - don’t say you aren’t getting fed - they’ve heard that one so much they won’t believe it - and truth is the only ones that need to be fed are babies - so if you’re not a new convert you are responsible for feeding yourself - and if you aren’t a new convert then you’re supposed to be helping feed others - no one is supposed to be feeding you - hebrews 5:12-14 - so if God is leading you to leave just say so - and leave it at that
be biblical - never leave over hurt feelings - if you have anything in your heart against anyone in the church - staff - leader - member - forgive them - mark 11:25 - if you can't forgive it then go to them - no one else - period - that is Jesus' explicit instruction - to the letter - matthew 18:15 - doing otherwise is willful disobedience - and sin! - and if you know someone in the church who has something against you - go to them - before you leave - make it right - don’t leave someone behind dealing with junk that you’ve long forgotten about - matthew 5:23-24
bless them - bless the church - bless the pastor - bless the ministries - speak highly of them publicly - privately too - if it is God's church you don't dare attack it! - not today - not next week - not next year - pray for them - ask God to give them favor - to reach every soul He has targeted for them - here is a good way to keep your attitude in check - send them an offering the week after you leave - designate it for the pastor's passion - or if you were hurt at him send it as a love offering for him - but keep that info to yourself - don’t brag about making the gift - stay humble
finally - leave - don't lurk in the shadows - don't hang around in their chat rooms - even if you are close to someone that still attends don't give them something to take back to church with them - don’t set them up to defend you in your absence - if you follow my admonitions above there will be no reason for defending you - leave - leave the issues alone - leave your issues alone - don't rejoice over the church’s problems - but rejoice every time you hear a great report about any ministry!
Comments
Post a Comment